Secrets of the Blood: My DNA (Briefly) Returns to Chicago

“Just when I thought I was out…they pull me back in.” – Michael Corleone, Godfather 3

Transitions are never what we think they are. They are usually far more frazzled and involve enough details to launch a rocket into space. Because geographic transitions are exactly that – launching yourself into some new stratosphere and hoping for a safe landing.

My apartment lease in Lakewood, Ohio, expired at 1PM on Tuesday December 31, 2013. By that point, lots of donation-bound furniture had still not been picked up (thanks to a few very well connected people it all eventually was) and the winter storms blanketing the Midwest ensured a cross-state drive would not be happening. But life moves forward and nothing waits. I turned in the keys to my building manager and got teared up doing so; a lot of very good things happened in my life during the two years I lived in Castlewood and the energy of my space there – not to mention the killer view – weren’t something someone just lets go of so easily. But it was time.

I then threw away the nearly expired CSU parking pass into the garbage and suddenly key-less and now snow-stranded headed to the Lakewood Library to return the Breaking Bad DVD and then to Fairview Mall to return my cable box to Cox. I then stopped by Art & Kristine’s and said good bye to the family that adopted me as their own. Skokie ties are strong ties. Even when they reconnect in Lakewood. It was an emotional farewell, but I know I’ll see the two of them and their great kids soon enough.

Finally, around 4:30PM, with a car full of clothes and work files, I headed to Daniel and Hannah’s cozy and lovely home. In life, there’s gratitude and then there’s gratitude. And words can’t express how thankful I was for their hospitality and generosity during my last 4 nights in the 216. It was, in sort, a full circle moment. Nearly ten years ago I met Daniel while we lived at The Statler, in a then still desolate downtown Cleveland.  During the past decade our friendships had grown and when he met Hannah, it was like getting a friendship BOGO. That they also moved to Lakewood was a gift.  And closing out the Cleveland chapter with them, in their home, felt karmic, in the best possible way.

After a 2-day storm delay, on Friday January 3, I finally embraced the drive from Cleveland to Chicago. Finding the pocket of opportunity between blizzards was tricky, but luckily it all worked out. The roads that day were clean and clear, no snow fell and no construction slowed me down. I made it within just under six hours, and that included two pit stops along the way.

Of course, there had to be some level of adventure: the temperature outside dropped to -3 and my windshield fluid froze. At one gas fill up, my hand, in gloves, got so cold that I struggled to twist the gas cap back on. And when I did fill up? Even the gas was cold, shaking up my steering wheel for about 20 minutes until it resumed normalcy. But, beyond these minor technicalities, I arrived safely and that mattered most.

Chicago hasn’t been home to me since August 2001, when just two weeks prior to 9/11 I left for graduate school. Don’t get me wrong, I love the people in Chicago and between immediate and extended family have a lot of relatives that I genuinely miss. But between the traffic, taxes, distances and cost of living, this city ensured my exit back then and created numerous barriers to entry for me to ever return here permanently.

So, I will be here, for a month. It’s my longest stay since first leaving and I am very much looking forward to spending unrushed time with family and friends, breaking bread and catching up with their lives and their adventures. I’m also looking forward to taking the El downtown and playing tourist in a city that seduces so many with its gorgeous skyline. Finally, I’ll be working with my clients and doing some writing; the whole goal of the past five years was getting myself to the point where I could work from anywhere and, well, I am now here. Or there. Or anywhere.

I’m looking forward to January in Chitown. I just wish the apocalyptic weather would go away. If anything, it’s reinforcing a brief stay and not an extended one. I’ve now lived on Lake Michigan, Lake Ontario and Lake Erie. And I’m very much finished with the Great Lakes. Yes, they are beautiful. But, I am done with shrugging my shoulders from the wind and watching my every step to avoid slippery winter falls. This weather and this lifestyle no longer works for me.

Since 1997 all I really wanted was to live in the sun and write books and share my life with someone who had the same vision in mind. Yet life has a certain power to renavigate us. And between graduate school and then a corporate job offer, fantastic opportunities kept renavigating me. I have no regrets; during my journey,  I’ve met the greatest people on the planet. I have crossed paths with the greatest souls who walk the earth. And when it comes to friendships, attracting such smart, big-hearted and funny A-listers is a gift I cherish. You are all with me, no matter where I go. As I am there for you.

Back in February 2011, my Sis used her miles and flew me out to Florida to join her on a work conference. It was then, as we enjoyed the pool, the sun, the warmth, the relaxed shoulders, that I looked at her and said, “I’m done with Cleveland.” Her reply? “I know you are, Sis.”

It took the past three years to get my life in order, to make huge changes and to get laser focused on what happens next. Professional and geographic autonomy were key. And I spent many late nights and lots and lots and lots of weekends working towards that goal.

And, so, as I get to enjoy the city that first welcomed my immigrant family all those years ago, I’m also not getting too comfortable. This is all part of the transition.  And with transitions, you gotta be ready for anything.